The place where I document the stupid stuff I do
As part of my Parish Council work I organised a litter pick. Because I’m mean I roped in Oli and Violet to come help. We split into two teams to cover the surrounding area and between us all picked up 19 bags of rubbish. My local area is now much tidier.
This tractor has been a proper pain in the arse. Every god damned year I’m having to repair something on it. This year on the first outing there was a horrific clattering noise from the blades when I started mowing. It seems I managed to shear some pins off the blade mounting and the blades got out of sync and started bashing into each other. Not cool.
In the past I’ve always jacked up the tractor and got busy underneath it but it seems my jack is broken and leaking fluid so it didn’t feel very safe being underneath quite a heavy mower doing repairs. To minimise the risk of me being decapitated by a collapsing jack I bought a new bit of kit.
It’s glorious. Truly fantastic. Repairs were made with two new blade mounts costing £8 each and the mower is back in business.
The grouting in the kitchen tiles is looking a bit grubby. I considered getting a scrubbing brush and getting on my hands and knees with a bit of soap but to paraphrase The Mandalorian “This is not the way”.
A long time ago when I was bored and had lots of disposable income I bought a raspberry pi powered robot kit and built it.
The observant amongst you will see the camera mounted on the front which I intend to use to guide the robot along the grouting lines. Once this bit is working I will fit some sort of motor powered scrubbing brush which will be used to clean the grouting. Then it is but a moments work to add some mapping code so that my raspberry pi powered scrubbing brush enabled beast can go for a drive around my kitchen and clean everything right up.
It’ll take me months to get it all working but it beats a bit of manual labour.
What could possibly go wrong.
Just a quickie, I took my tofu in batter cooking skills and upgrade it to chicken. Was equally fantastic.
Josh, who has featured in this blog many times, is getting married. He decided to have his stag-do in Munich….in February! We thought it was going to be wooly underpants and a big jacket type weather. Turns out climate change had other plans and it was a glorious weekend, especially on Saturday, but I get ahead of myself.
I initially booked my flight with EasyJet but that flight was getting in quite late and all the London boys were arriving in the afternoon, so I booked another flight with Lufthansa and then upgraded it to Business Class so that I could go to the lounge rather than hang out with the unwashed masses in Manchester Airport.
On the first night we went to the Bier Halle in Munich and had a fantastic time.
The next day was absolutely glorious. It was going to be the best day of the weekend weatherwise so a plan was formed to got to the Biergarten am Chinesischen Turm. First though Dragan and I went for breakfast and then Michal got himself together and we headed into Munich Old Town.
After some beers in the square watching the clock do its thing with the glockenspiel and the dancing statue things we walked over to the beer garden in the sunshine
Then a quick pedal bike tuktuk thing for me and Josh and off to the restaurant we all went.
The next day, Sunday, was a bit rainy but we ventured into town and had some early beers. Josh disappeared off to get the dressing on his wound changed. The last two trips I’ve been on with Josh has resulted in him being hospitalised. The boy is a menace. Whilst Josh was away I tucked into some Currywurst, with my beer.
Following the beers we went to a Karaoke bar where I absolutely murdered Dream On by Aerosmith which inspired me to set myself a 2026 challenge. More on that in August. I don’t think the lyrics had even begun before I ripped off my top and flung it across the room. German beer really is that good! Thai food followed and then Michal and I went on another mission. Then to bed and a frighteningly early start flying back to Blighty. Upon landing in Manchester I decided I hadn’t drank quite enough for the weekend and met Charlie and Ellie along with her cousin in Manchester for more wine and then home to sleep. Took me a good few days to recover from the trip.
Many, many, many years ago I met a couple of Japanese girls in Cambridge. They were only there briefly and we became friendly. The time came for them to return to Japan and so we bade our farewells the night before their early flight.
I was a bit shocked by a very early morning knocking on my door. When I opened it the girls very ceremoniously presented me with two Origami Cranes that they had made. I kept those origami creations for quite a while but in those days I was frequently moving house by bicycle and splitting my time between my Rochdale parental home and whatever student accommodation I was in and I lost them, along with many other things.
Now that I find myself with a lot more time on my hands I decided to take some Origami paper that we bought for Oli years ago and learn how to fold an Origami Crane.
This is my first attempt. This one is earmarked for Scouse as I made it on his birthday and promised to give it to him as a sign of peace, love and harmony.
Emma was off school, the kids didn’t need anything from us so we decided to have a jolly day out looking at cars. Well, one car in paricular. We want a Telsa Model Y.
We were going to go look at the Tesla showroom in Manchester and then have lunch with Charlie. Unfortunately on this day he was doing some recording and wouldn’t be about – so we went to Liverpool instead which is “closer”. I say “closer” because it always seems to take ages to drive anywhere in Liverpool. It’s all traffic lights and roundabouts and little roads. We should bulldoze half of Liverpool and put a motorway straight into the centre. Anyway, I digress.
We got to the Liverpool Tesla Centre and immediately jumped into their Model Y and started pressing buttons. It’s almost exactly the same as our Model 3 but it has some funky interior lighting and buttons to fold down the back seat and close the boot. Loved it. We walked in intending to just have a look and wait until more details about the Range Rover Velar EV came out to compare the two, but we didn’t, we slapped a £200 reservation on a Model Y Long Range All Wheel Drive. We went for that spec as we’re considering driving to the Alps for Xmas and AWD seemed a sensible option. We should get it in May. Exciting.
When we left the Tesla store Emma mentioned that Lark Lane was nearby and she’d always wanted to check it out. So off we went. As soon as we arrived I felt at home. Bohemian chilled vibe, lots of little shops, bakeries and restaurants. Beautiful people. We ultimately ended up in Yum Cha, a chinese dim sum place. Absolutely fantastic. They even had Xia Long Bau – not quite up the Beijing Dumpling standard but pretty bloody close.
Whilst we were pondering what to order I heard the fella behind me talking about Spicy Wontons and how great they were. So I ordered a plate of them. Best. Thing. Ever. I’m going back and I’m buying more.
Excellent day out!
After all the effort that I put in. All the testing with Jaz and Violet, all the dragging the “kennel” up and down the garden, the cat that adopted us [ Moses/Pickle ] is finally warm and dry
but not looking entirely happy about having his own house.
I think he just hates me.
Those who know me will know that I like a bit of Tofu when I’m doing Asian cooking. I always used to just cover it in a bit of cornflour and fry it until it was good and firm and then mix it in with a sauce.
But I always had a dream. I always wanted to make the tofu into tofu balls like you get from the Chinese takeaway when you get Sweet and Sour Chicken. Well my dear reader. I finally got off my arse and googled how to do it. Ten minutes later…et voila
Seriously – just check that shit out.
I went the whole hog and made my own sweet and sour sauce to go over tofu balls. It was amazing. I didn’t get a picture of that bit. I was too busy eating. Definitely making it all again and it’s even got the point that I was drooling over a deep fat fryer at CostCo the other day.
You all know I’m fond of laying in bed in the morning and having a good old wordle. Well this was just too good not to screenshot and post about…yeah, that’s how empty and vacuous my life really is.
My fellow wordlers will get it
My goal was to buy a new inflatable thing for the Xmas front garden dumb ass nativity scene. I didn’t quite get my crap together this year in time to get one but managed it after the “scene” had been taken down. Please be kind and welcome the Xmas Hippo into the fold.
Oli always does a fine job of buying me Xmas gifts. This year he excelled by combining two of my favourite things, chess and drinking.
He bought me a chess piece [ Queen ] decanter which I filled with Diplomatico rum. It’s not quite that full anymore.
As an aside, in the past I could quite happily sit there drinking wine whilst playing Oli at chess and still win. He’s improved. Now I daren’t play him if I’ve had so much as a sniff of wine.
After all my work installing the lighty-uppy-arcade-buttons the day finally arrived. We drank Bucks Fizz from early morning. We moved onto wine. We ate turkey and ham and potatoes and vegetables with stuffing and gravy. We devoured trifle and then eventually made it down to my office.
Usually the annual Tetris-Off is myself and Charlie. This year Oli joined in with us….and annoyingly won.
The competition was all about score. Since we’re going for score the tactic is absolutely to get a “Tetris” when you clear four lines in one go. Oli, being the gung-ho, shit or bust, little turd that he is, absolutely went for it. His stack would get so close to the top but then he’d manage to pull off a Tetris and get the game back under control. It’s not really that we can blame it on fluke as we all had a warm-up game first. In the warm up it went Oli, Me, Charlie. Then we had the proper tournament, and it went Oli, Me, Charlie. So, pretty consistent stuff and unfortunately Oli takes the 2025 Tetris crown.
Pretty sure I’ve mentioned many times that I like a good family tradition of going to The Plough at the end of each term for food and drinks with the kids. We’ve missed it a few times because the kids have no respect, absolute zero, for the family tradition a la Darren. Anyway, this time they made it with the additional bonus of Big Bobble hats on heads
The dog was there with us…not entirely sure where she is at this point – but she’s deffo there.
Poor dog – she has the patience of a saint.
One day she is absolutely going to get sick of me and rip my face off.
I’m part of the Parish Council. Ever since I’ve been a member the Vice Chairman has baked fresh mince pies for the December meeting. Last year, when I was the Vice Chairman, I baked fresh mince pies for the December meeting. This year, when I find myself as Chairman of the Parish Council I was looking forward to the Vice Chairman baking up a storm, but he quit instead, and so I donned my apron.
They were lush.
Managed to make it into town for drinks and food with the darling nephew birthday boy and Ellie.
Gluhwein was consumed. Beer was consumed. Indian Food was consumed and a tram ride home with some drunken teenager creating a pool of vomit. Ahhh, we’ve all been there.
The lighty uppy arcade buttons arrived and I wasted no time in hooking them up to a 240v to 5v transformer that I had laying around.
After installing the wiring loom of GND and 5V throughout the cabinet I did a quick test.
The only real problem now is that each lighty uppy button [ I have 16 of them ] now needs four wires, two for the LED and two for the microswitch that controls the button presses. Subsequently, it’s looking a bit of a mess inside the cabinet. Maybe on Arcade Cabinet Part 3 I’ll tidy all that up.
Finally….finally! It’s now ready for the tetris-off. See that bottom right button looks a bit green? It’s because it is. The button people sent me three blue LEDs and a green one by accident. They’ve since sent me out a blue LED but as I write this I haven’t installed it yet.
Every year we go to the Xmas Market and every year I crave Coconut Macaroons. Love them. Favouritest thing ever. This year was no different. We tracked the Macaroon shop down to Piccadilly Gardens and I approached. The first thing I noticed was that they were about half the size of last year and the second thing was they were more expensive. Robbing bastards. I still bought them though – and yeah, they were excellent.
A couple of weeks later Emma and I were heading up to York to visit Amelia. I enquired if there was anywhere on the York Xmas Market selling Macaroons. Amelia thought not. I was disappointed. So I decided to make my own.
They turned out absolutely fantastic. Two bags of dessicated coconut, a tin of evaporated milk and a drop of vanilla. Boom
Will definitely be making them again.
Yeah so I built an arcade cabinet quite a while ago. I’ve had all sorts of fun and good times with it over the years and it’s now the location of the annual Tetris-off between Charlie and myself. The only problem is when I first built it I didn’t really know what I was doing with the electrics. The earth wiring loom that came with the joysticks was a 4.8mm female spade connector which was absolutely perfect for the joysticks, but the buttons had a 2.5mm male spade. So being the “it’ll do” person that I was I put the 2.5mm spade into the 4.8mm female and crushed it with a pair of pliers. This worked ok’ish. Every now and then a button would stop working and I’d have to go digging around inside and make a repair.
Fast forward to November 2025 and I thought to myself “must do a bit of a service on the arcade cabinet and make sure everything is working for the Tetris-off”. So I fired it up and true to form one of the buttons wasn’t working. So I opened up the cabinet and went inside. Pretty quickly found the dangling wire and reattached it. In doing so I managed to dislodge two more connections and in fixing those connections dislodge some more. I was properly pissed off. Didn’t even need the original broken button for the Tetris-off anyway.
Anyway, given that I’m now more of a man of leisure I tend to do things properly and make sure I don’t have to fix them again in the future.
So out I went to the local electricians shop place which is like a trip to Aladdin’s cave for me, and picked up the new crimper pictured above and a selection of connectors of different sizes. Turns out if I’d gone to an online components shop I’d have saved a fortune but you live and learn…plus I wanted them that day because despite my mature years I’m still an impatient bugger.
I started taking the buttons out one by one and doing a better 2.5mm female spade connection to the 2.5mm male spade connector on the button. Because I’m doing it properly I had a bunch of black wire that I made connections with a 2.5mm female spade on one end ( for the GND connection of the button ) and a 4.8mm male spade on the other end. The goal was to make it easy to identify the GND connections from the signal connections. Incidentally I also used the appropriate coloured wire for the signals, so now the red buttons have a red wire and the blue buttons have a blue wire.
Everything was going swimmingly until I came across a few buttons where the connector snapped off after I disconnected/reconnected it one too many times. They’re pretty flimsy connectors and not really designed to be mucked about with by a clumsy oaf with a pair of pliers. Rather than just buy some new buttons I thought I’d break out my trusty Dremel and my soldering iron and repair them. How hard could it be?
Turns out it wasn’t really that hard. I managed to get two of the buttons working again but the green button was properly cabbaged and I’d have to buy a new one. Slightly annoying, but not the end of the world.
So I went on eBay but couldn’t find matching buttons and then I ended up on https://paradisearcadeshop.com/collections/buttons where I managed to find a matching green button.
But I didn’t buy it.
Whilst looking at green buttons I saw that you could now get a green button with an LED inside it. God damned lighty up arcade buttons! How had I not heard of these before now? So I ordered four green buttons and four red buttons to give it a bit of a test run before committing to all sixteen buttons.
This opened up a whole new can of worms…